Why did I think this was a good idea?
I asked myself this same question half-way up the Manitou Incline and I asked myself this same question half-way through the Tough Mudder.
The Tough Mudder (for those few who don’t know what it is) is a 10 mile race on rough terrain through an obstacle course. Â And the obstacles are not for the faint of heart.

I purposely did not look at the obstacles again before I left because I didn’t want to know.
Let’s examine some now.
The Arctic Enema. Â Jumping into a tank full of ice water, dunking under water, and swimming to the other side. Â Why not?
This isn’t even the sadistic part.
The sadistic part is before this you had to carry a 35 lb of ice 100 yards and then dump it in the tank.
“So we’re carrying our own torture devices?”
“That’s right.”
Images of crucifixion come to mind.
This was horrible. Â This was so bad. Â It lasted maybe 30 seconds but once you get out you can’t feel any part of your body. Â You just carry on, mute, hoping you are following the right path.
Everest.
Infamous amongst Tough Mudders.
You’ve seen the pictures. Â People forming human chains to get up it. Â Helping each other. Â The ultimate picture of camaraderie.
Well, now picture facing Everest ALONE.
I’m not kidding here.
Unbeknownst to me, I had signed up for the TOUGHEST MUDDER, for seasoned Mudders who travel all over the country doing these crazy courses most weekends.
All I knew was I was signing up to be timed. Â That’s it.
Well, since I signed up for this, we started first on the course. Â So there was hardly anyone in front of me. Â Now, you all know I’m a runner and this course was a lot of running so I was by myself a lot of the time. Â Something you don’t want to be at the obstacles.
So here I am, facing this huge wall of white.  Well, I just run at it.  Thanks to CrossFit, the rope climb was no problem.  But I get stuck at the top.  The rope hangs over a lip and you have to throw  your foot up over the side (which would have been great information to have had when I had momentum).
Here I am, clinging to the side of the wall, stuck. Â And I clung there for probably about 2 minutes, waiting for the 2 volunteers to help me up. Â They grabbed my foot and I got up. Â Barely.
Augustus Gloop. Â Another obstacle with water. Â Not again! Â You go under water, climb up a ladder all while running water is dripping on top of you. Â I can’t see a thing cause this is no drip-drop. Â It’s sheer running water. Â It sucks.
The Funky Monkey Revolution. Â All I know is there are monkey bars and water below. Â I tell myself, “I am NOT falling into that water.” Â That’s the last thing I want–is to get wet again. Â So, thanks to CrossFit, I cross this obstacle all the way–slowly, very slowly–and ungracefully. Â Apparently, I’m the first woman to do so all day they tell me. Â Water was the motivator here.
Overall, I had a great time except for the being wet the entire time part. Â At the beginning of the day, it was cold. Â I was shivering before we even started. Â We got wet right away and I was miserable. Â The sun didn’t come out until 1 hour into the course. Â It sucked.
Then right when I dried off, Arctic Enema. Â Then 2 more waters in a row. Â I was done. Â I was sopping wet and it all sucked.
If I’m going to torture my body, I think I’d rather enjoy it.
Take aways from the Mudder:
- Never again am I purposely submerging myself in 20 degree cold water.
- The bruises hurt more as the days pass.
- Don’t forget sunglasses again!
- Snacks and gloves are useless when wet.
- The key is to never stop for more than a minute break. Â Just keep moving.
- Comfort yourself with Starbucks. Â It never fails.
- The end is the best part: Â See. Â I’m even smiling!

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