I can’t take it anymore
It’s bursting inside
Screaming to come out
Yet, I want to run and hide.
You live in my dreams
It’s better that way
But the facade is draining
Trying to push you away.
I’m addicted to the feeling
When you are near
Biting my lip
Is a new frontier.
To tell, to not to tell
To feel, to not feel
I’ll play it safe
Afraid I’ll kneel.
You make me feel
Is that a crime?
“I’m not dead”
Not this time.
I’m not afraid
Why should I be?
Heart beats in the night
Just you and me.
Say “yes”
And the rest?
“What will be, will be…”
It comes, and it goes
This feeling I have
Am I the only one?
Is it all I have?
You don’t need me
Like I need you
It’s all in my head
What should I do?
Despite my uncertainty
Despite my fray
All I know is this:
I want to continue to feel this way
I’d rather feel than not feel
Rather be alive than dead
Chasing away thoughts
Not thinking ahead.
Blindly diving in
Consequences be damned
One last chance
A dangerous devil dance.
I’m not afraid to live
I’d rather feel than not feel at all
I am strong enough to handle
Whatever turns the wheel.
I’d rather live
Than not feel
I’d rather be hurt
Than give in and kneel.
When you want to reach out, but you don’t know how
When you know you should pull back, but you ignore that anyhow
When life throws you curves, you go straight
When you throw reckless to the wind, you find the perfect mate
When you’re so fucked up, you wonder how you’re alive
Only one thing pulses the heart — and he’s suicide.
