Trust the Process…

“Queen Impatient”.db4974f641c5be2292b40f79a31c5d15-travel-inspiration-motivation-inspiration

You could call me that.

So when I tell myself to “trust the process” I feel like such a hypocrite.

But in the end, that’s the only choice I have.  Anything else is undue stress.

Because if you want to be good at anything in life, it takes time.

Handstand walks.

I want them so bad.

And I’m close.

Trust the process.

Olympic lifting.

I want great form.

Small steps.

Trust the process.

Losing weight and maintaining my diet for the rest of my life.

Trust the process.  Trust the process.  Trust the process…

I Feel Blah…

Everything in my life right now is blah:  work, CrossFit, health, diet, food, life in general.

CrossFit programming is boring due prepping for the CrossFit Open.  It’s ceaseless rowing, thrusters, double unders, and burpees.

Work.  Where to start?  I just want to be independently wealthy.

Diet.  I started a new 8 week program.  I’m sticking to it, but I’m about as enthused as an aphid when a ladybug lands on her plant.


I feel like I’m going through the motions–motions I don’t even like.

My body is bloated.  My sleep sucks.  My period is out of whack.  My stomach hurts.

Menopause?  Stress?  Diet?  Winter Blues?

Who knows?

This, too, shall pass.  This, too, shall pass…

I Become Obsessive When I Can’t Do Something…

Anyone else like this?

My current goal is to have handstand walks by the Open.

I know, it’s a lofty goal, and I don’t know if I’ll make it.  But I’m working my butt off trying.

And it’s become a bit obsessive at this point.

Every chance I get I’m flipping around.  I’m trying to hold my handstand longer.  Trying to get my kick ups right every time.  Doing my WodPrep course I signed up for on my off days from strength.  Having my gymnastic daughter teach me all the tricks and spot me.  Practicing, practicing, practicing–that’s what I’m doing.

And it’s hard to stop.

I had to stop to write this post.

But only after a got in one more handstand!

Any time I can’t do something I become obsessed until I can.  Because I know with enough practice and hard work I can do anything.  This applies to life as well.  Writing novels.  Learning a new computer program.  Changing jobs and mastering it.  I constantly have to be challenged or I get bored and move on.  This is why CrossFit is my passion.  Because there’s always something to work on, something to improve, or something to learn.

Without it (or whatever it is you crave in your life), you’re just going through the motions and life loses its meaning.

And who wants that?

Find Something You Can Win At….And then DO IT!!

When I ran 5k’s and didn’t place, it sucked.

I especially didn’t like it if it was crowded, and I’m running on a boring course like city streets.

Now that I’m older, I’m winning at 5k’s in my age group.  And it’s fun!

It doesn’t matter the prize, I just like to win.  It can be a pie.  It can be a Christmas ornament.  Or it can be $50!  There’s something inside of me (and I believe inside all of us) that likes to win.  I don’t know if it’s vanity or shallowness or self-validation.  All I know is man is created to always strive to do better, to be better, to test his limits and his skills.  And when we accomplish a goal or do better than others, endorphins kick in and we feel alive!  We feel ecstatic.  We feel for lack of a better word–validated.  As if our existence means something.  If only for a fleeting moment in time…

The same is true for CrossFit.

I CrossFit because I like to win.  I like to beat the boys.  I like to beat everyone.  I like to be on top.  It doesn’t always happen (in fact, it’s less frequent than I’d like), but when it does, my day is stellar.  My confidence is up.  My attitude is winning.  My perspective sees the big picture instead of the miniscule daily irritations in life.

All because I won at something.

Over the weekend, I was talking to my husband about this same thing.  He used to race motorcycles.  And win all the time.  He used to be one of the top racers in his class.  He misses that.  He misses the competition.  But mainly he misses winning.  He is seeking that “thing” again in his life.  Because we all need it…351e79i

My advice to you:  find your “thing” and win at it!  Pickleball.  Tennis.  Swimming.  Running races.  CrossFit.  Board games.  Pool.  Or team sports: softball, basketball, flag football, etc.  Writing contests.  Pie-eating or baking contests.  Quilting.  There is no end to what this world offers.

Find your passion.  Do your passion.  Win at your passion.

Trust me, if you do, your life will be much more fulfilling, meaningful, vivacious, and full of hope.  Your confidence will skyrocket.  You’ll be more content and ready to take the inevitable beatings the world pummels you with.

Every victory counts.  No matter how small.

Because it’s the small victories in life that climb the highest obstacles in your path.

New Year’s Day…


4:30 am- 6am:  Hit the gym for a WOD and strength.  It was slow going since I’m recovering from my cold, but I did it.

6:30 am:  Walked my dog in the freezing cold.

7:30 am:  Handstand practice at home

8 am:  Breakfast

8:30 am:  Shower and dress for the day.

10 am:  Read books with kids.

10:30 am:  Errands in town.

12:00 pm:  Lunch.

1:00 pm:  Chores around the house.

This morning I did DT.  I had a coughing fit in the middle of round 2.  I also only did 95 lbs cause I knew my head was not in it and neither was my body.  I surprised myself though:  I did all push jerks unbroken–and they were easy for me!  So excited to learn this!  This means I’m stronger than I think and in 6 months I’ll RX DT with no problems!

When Your Body Tells You No More…

I worked out on Tuesday.  I back squatted.  I did the WOD.  I did an hour of FIT classes.  I was wiped.

On Wednesday I did the WOD and it took everything I had.  I didn’t want to do anything.  I also subbed an hour fitness class.  It was during this class that my voice started to go.

I knew it:  I was getting sick.

Last night was miserable.  I tossed and turned.  I was hot and cold.  I took some Nyquil and that finally helped me to sleep.

I had a hard time getting out of bed in the morning.thcawovzca

I had a fever.

I took some DayQuil.

That kicked in and I took a shower and managed a bit of house work until it wore off and my fever returned.

I had a meeting with work.  Downed more DayQuil to get through it.

Then home to bed.

My body had had enough.

Rest.  Rest.  And more rest.

As hard as that is, that’s what I need.

I Could Be Doing So Much More…

Work is easy.4905cbf94e5942bfadcd5bb06646a0f5-tag

When it becomes easy, it’s time to move on.

The Open is coming.  I gotta prepare.  I finally feel “over” my injuries.

It’s go time.

In both areas of my life.

When I need a change, I get an itch.  Not a literal one.  But an uneasiness inside.  And it’s here now.

I’m praying about a job that will pay me what I’m worth and work for my family and one I can be passionate about and not dread every day.

Today in CrossFit I realized I need to push myself more.  I can be so much faster.  But I didn’t push.  I was upset afterwards.

I’m at the level in CrossFit where I’m the first one done, but I have no one to push me. And I need that.  And in my box it doesn’t exist.

I’m uneasy in both areas.  I feel like I’m not doing enough.  I need to do more.